So the other day I am firing around Target at my typical 127 miles per hour when I come to a screeching, turn-the-cart-sideways halt — much to the alarm of mothers shopping with their nap-woozy toddlers.
Really, Target? What are you trying to do to me displaying Christmas cards when my AC is still blowing full-blast? When I am still wearing flip-flops? When I am in full-fledged planning mode for Columbus Day celebrations? (Kidding. With all due respect to Columbus and his accomplishments.)
I am still convinced that Martha Stewart wrought all kinds of bad karma upon herself by raising the bar like she did on Christmas. How can we remember the reason for the season if we accidentally seal our eyelids shut with holiday stamps? (Incidentally, those go on sale Oct. 13. You’re welcome.)
Maybe I should thank Target, because at least they’ve got me thinking about holiday gifts. More specifically, great teacher gifts. Because every year I grow perplexed about what to give the people who are guiding my children’s education (while giving me time to terrorize shoppers at Target with my wild cart driving.)
My perplexed state inevitably becomes procrastination, which then becomes a last-minute panicked purchase of a gift certificate to Wally’s Wild World of Crappy Crafts or something similar.
Let’s face it, it’s hard to thank someone who gives so much to your children for $20 or less. Impossible, really, but let’s give it a shot. I’m thinking if we put our heads together we can come up with some great gift suggestions. Leave your ideas here in the comment section. Or better yet, go to Pinterest and post ideas here. (Not on Pinterest? It is seriously the best time-suck EVER. Loads better than Facebook. You must have an invite, so please send me an email at amymacprATgmailDOTcom and I will send you one and put you on my list to post to this board.)
I won’t place parameters on this little experiment, but I will say if I were a teacher I would use all apple-related gifts as target practice. (Which is one reason I am not a teacher. And why I do not own a shotgun.) Also, if you post something that is handmade and will require more than a couple of hours to finish, please see above about bad karma. I love being crafty, but think glue guns can be used as serious weapons during the holiday season. And not in a good, crafty way.
I seem to be talking a good bit about firearms, which means I should stop drinking coffee and end this post.
One last request: send this to all the educators you know. I’d love to hear what treats they love and what finds its way to their charity of choice before Jan. 1.
XOXO, my faithful readers.
Photo via Pinterest