The Ten-Year Learning Curve

Anyone who has a child (whether a brand-new baby or one old enough for college) has read a parenting book. Lots of them are full of sound advice, and some of them are ... not. I recently wrote an article for Northside Woman about a few things I wish I'd read in a book when my girls were tiny babies. What advice do you have for new moms that they'll never read in a book?

No News Is Good News

Today’s my first day back at my desk after a luxuriously news-free week at the beach, soaking up the rays and catching up on a few good books.

I say news-free, because here’s my typical working day: after stumbling out of bed and grabbing my first cup of coffee, I turn on the Today Show to see if Matt and Meredith are reporting any breaking news. Then I read the Atlanta Journal-Constitution from front page to back (although not terribly carefully) to see what’s happening locally. Throughout the day I’ll check CNN.com and other news sites, and I browse trade web sites to see what’s new.

Part of my job is to pay attention to which reporters are writing what, and to spot any trends of which my clients need to be a part. I enjoy developing interesting story angles for reporters – especially when one of my clients can play a critical role as a source.

I’ll also admit to being endlessly amused by the antics of celebrities and politicians, and most enjoy sharing various shockers with my peeps (go ahead, ask my family where they first heard about Michael Jackson!) Plus newspapers offer fabulous stories like one I recently read in the Memphis Commercial Appeal titled “Murderous Hillbillies Descend on Memphis.” Top that for an eye-catching title.

But I am not going to kid you – it was nice to take a news break last week. I didn’t see the Today Show gang once. Never read the paper. Honestly, there was one day where I wasn’t even sure what day it was. That was kind of nice.

It seems nothing terribly important happened while I was away … but it’s sort of nice to be back in the news cycle today. So you can relax folks, because if news breaks, I am back on the case. If you’ll excuse me, I am heading to the bookstore to buy the last two weeks’ issues of the Atlanta Business Chronicle.

No Comment

In my last post I wrote about being “published” in Peter Bowerman’s Well-Fed Writer book. Peter sent me a nice thank you note via email for plugging the book on my blog, and mentioned trying to post the thank you as a comment under the blog post. He gave up when he was asked to set up an account or “sign in.” Emailing ensued, and the ever-helpful Peter suggested I check the settings for commenting on my blog.


Lo and behold, the settings (which I’d never considered until the very moment Peter emailed me) are extremely stringent. To comment on this blog you essentially had to provide me with your PIN number, your bank account number and carte blanche to purchase whatever I wanted at Sephora. (Which I encourage you to do anyway if you are so inclined.)


Perhaps it wasn’t that bad, but it was pretty ridiculous - completely by accident, I assure you. So if any of you have avoided commenting because it was going to take too much time, I have unchained the shackles and hope you’ll write, suggest, question… delight me with your creative commentary.


However, I recommend you send your bank account and pin numbers directly to my email. We wouldn’t want just anyone having that information.

Amy Mac, Published Author

Perhaps “published author” is a tiny stretch, as my at-home mom success story was simply included in Peter Bowerman’s recent reissue of his popular The Well-Fed Writer book (which updates and combines the content of both his original Well-Fed Writer titles). But nevertheless, right there on page 317 is my name in bright lights – shining like a huge Broadway sign. Okay, so it’s just my name in bold print but I am still extremely happy about this little turn of events.

It was Peter’s book that convinced me I should launch my business a few years back. Until then I was working under a few (wrong) assumptions:

First, I thought since I didn’t have the professional networks in Atlanta I did when we lived in Cincinnati and Memphis, it would be impossible to launch a successful business. (Sadly, the only networks I developed – or needed - in Wisconsin were ones with the LL Bean Extremely Heavy Winter Wear department). Turns out, I’d developed all the networks I needed through various activities, volunteer positions and friendships I’d cultivated.

Second, I was worried about the extra-large (about five year) gap in my resume. While it’s true being a mom can create a certain “foggy” feeling in the brain, I had not sustained an actual head injury - and had not lost all my writing and marketing knowledge. Fact is, if you are good at what you’re doing most people don’t really care if you’ve taken a break to facilitate nap schedules, potty train toddlers, and provide transportation to the park and the pediatrician (roughly in that order.)

Third, I was concerned about maintaining a professional façade when the reality was loud children, barking dogs, and frequent (yet amusing) household catastrophes. Turns out some well-designed business cards on thick card stock, wi-fi, and liberal use of the mute button took care of those concerns.

Really though, it was Peter’s book that put it all in perspective for me. Part business primer, part pep-talk, it was just the push I needed to start the business that I am still surprised I didn’t start sooner (because I really enjoy it that much! Really!)

So a question: what little things that are holding you back that really don’t amount to a hill of beans … and should they really be holding you back?

So, Peter – congratulations on your newest title, thanks for letting me be a small part of it – but mostly, thanks for reminding me (and lots of other commercial freelance writers) most of the obstacles are just in our head – and easily overcome .

Yes or No

When the girls were toddlers they were, well, typical toddlers. When overwhelmed with too many decisions, they’d either collapse into a crying heap on the floor or simply ignore you in hopes you’d disappear and leave them alone to watch The Wiggles in peace.

That’s when I figured out my trick question that has served me well ever since: yes or no? So here’s how it goes:

Do you want to have milk with dinner, yes or no? Would you like to wear your favorite pink shirt today, yes or no? Would you like to read a book now, yes or no?

This little question eliminates the need for much thinking, you either DO or you DO NOT. This took a lot of guesswork out of situations not requiring any real thought. It continues to serve me well now that the girls are older. For example:

Is your room clean, yes or no? (Feel free to keep saying “yes or no?” while they offer multiple caveats and explanations for why their room is not clean. Eventually they break down and give you the only answer you are looking for: yes or no.)

Would you like to retain the right to play the Wii, yes or no? (When the affirmative answer presents itself, it is followed up with a “then quit arguing with your sister.”)

It is equally effective with adults. For example, just last week I posed the question to my sister: “Do you want a glass of wine, yes or no?” while I stood with bottle of white wine tipped precariously over the top of a wine glass. She shrieked yes quickly, more because she felt the pressure to answer versus really wanting a glass of wine. See how effective this is? Another tip: saying “yes or no” quickly and a little louder than you normally talk in polite company while simultaneously raising your eyebrows to your hairline elicits the response you want approximately 97 percent of the time.

It is such an effective way to get folks into action-oriented mode, my extended family has adopted this in a semi-joking manner. At our upcoming beach trip, I’d be willing to bet I hear “yes or no?” a million times, and it won’t just be me saying it. Just call me a trendsetter.

Go ahead, try it. Follow up those easy questions with “yes or no?” You’ll either get a commitment, or know you need to move to plan “B.”

Now, did you enjoy this blog post, yes or no?